1. Dudes who walk into an empty bathroom and use the middle urinal causing me to walk into a nearly empty bathroom and break the "don't use a urinal next to an already occupied urinal" rule. Hey, don't make it look like it's my fault when you're the rule breaker!
2. Technology made to make my life a tad bit simpler, but ends up making my life way more difficult when it doesn't work. For example, remember when you used to be able to turn a knob and water would pour forth from your sink? That wasn't so difficult right? Now while I'm in the bathroom at work (after being forced against my will to break the urinal rule) I have to wave like an idiot under each faucet hoping at least one will work long enough to dampen my hands. Thank goodness we've done away with those insanely difficult knobs. Life is so much easier now!
3. Bluetooth head sets. No explanation needed.
4. People with a total inability to utilize their vehicle's turn signals. Now I don't know about your car, but in my car I have an easily-manipulated lever located conveniently right next to my steering wheel that I can use to communicate my upcoming actions to other drivers around me. It's really a pretty remarkable device. You might know that your driveway is only a block and a half away, but without a turn signal, I have absolutely no idea why you are driving eleven miles an hour right now.
5. 24-Hour news channels. If you have no more details since the last update six minutes ago, then why are you giving us an update? I guess it is maybe a tad bit entertaining to hear a CNN anchor say things live on camera like "we're really just guessing here," or "we can't tell you why police are chasing this man, but we do have blurry video for you."
6. This new thing where you pay for something like an umbrella with your debit card and they give you a slip with a line for a tip. Why would I tip you? Why must you make me feel cheap when I'm forced to enter a zero on the tip line as if I'm starving your family? If you want a tip, cut my hair or deliver food to my table or something. Am I wrong here?
7. The radio. How do people listen to the radio for longer than eight minutes without going crazy? Do they realize that with an iPod or a CD you can listen to music that you choose without listening to 45 minutes of ads every hour? Finally, some technology that really does make our lives easier.
8. Football absolutely dominating anything sports related on the radio and TV when baseball is in the stretch run and the football season hasn't even started yet. Why do I need to know about the Dolphin's third string quarterback options two months before the season starts? I'm pretty sure Tom Brady just proved why preseason guessing games are worthless.
9. Mock drafts. I'm a dude and a sports fan, but I just don't understand why every single employee of ESPN, from the lunch lady to Stuart Scott needs to give us their mock drafts every day. Here's an idea, if the draft is tomorrow, let's just wait and see what happens tomorrow. I bet it'll even be accurate!
10. Writing checks. Unless you're over the age of 90 or you're paying a utility bill in the comfort of your own home, you should NOT be writing checks. Certainly not in public. Its called a debit card. Look into it. No really, look into it.
Since I'm not a totally negative guy, here are 10 things I like:
1. My wife's guacamole.
2. Brollie and Eva when they wake up from naps and their heads are extra cone head-like.
3. Skippy natural peanut butter with golden delicious apples.
4. Long walks on the beach. No, seriously.
5. My MacBook.
6. The 13000 songs in my iTunes. (I love each of them, much like a parent loves each of their children.
7. Watching 72 episodes of Lost in a month with Kristen.
8. Flaming Amy' burritos.
9. Iced coffee.
10. Lists of things.
1 comment:
i love Mac's :)
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